Dealing with Detox
Detoxing from a trauma-bonded relationship is not easy. As you start, your mind will be hovering about your past relationship, and you might be saying to yourself how you will never speak to the person again. On the other hand, the allure of the person will still be overwhelming, and the push-pull effect will weigh down on your detox progress.
If you are in such a dilemma, you should instead focus on getting through the day or through a time frame that you set for yourself, such as an hour.
A simple activity that you can use to overcome your struggle is as follows;
It's noon, I can get to 7 pm without contacting the person.
It's 5 pm, I will avoid checking their social media status on my way home from work.
It would help if you prolonged the time frame once you make it to the set time without contacting the person.
To be successful in your detox journey, you should accept that you have a strong urge to call them and avoid denying or ignoring your feelings and thoughts. This strategy will enable you to develop a coping mechanism against the overwhelming urge to call or check how your ex-partner is faring.
A key solution to the temptation is to consciously prioritize self-love and disentangle yourself from the toxicity, fear, and conditioning you have been subjected to. You can watch a movie, exercise, or do something that healthily deviates your attention at these low moments.
Remember that we want you to embrace your feelings and thoughts just as they are. If you recall, denial, avoidance, and cognitive dissonance set you on a slippery path to a trauma-bonded relationship. Also, when you avoid an aspect of yourself, you are treating your thoughts and feelings as counterproductive problems as you deal with detox.
The addiction that fuels a toxic relationship is a mechanism by the body and mind to self-regulate. Therefore, undoing the addiction requires a systematic approach with realistic milestones that you can set for yourself against specific timeframes. To ensure that your healing attempt is seamless, you may need to create a mood journal that lists your triggers. Identifying your triggers will enable you to organize your detox strategy while considering all the relevant factors required to ensure that your healing is successful.
Dealing with detox can be uncomfortable since addiction is overwhelming and alluring. It would be best if you made a conscious decision of turning around your life. When you remember that ‘this isn’t the reality’ you can follow through with your plan to overcome your trauma.