"If I don't do everything completely right, I am a failure" is a doctrine that many people subscribe to, resulting in the development of perfectionism. On the contrary to this much-internalized doctrine, some of the greatest inventions made by man come from numerous failed experiments coupled with the inventors drive to succeed. Failures present the opportunity to better our efforts the next time and act as learning experiences.
To lead a simplified life; the first step is by acknowledging your mistakes. It is also essential you study other people by watching their moves, learning from their mistakes. Affirm to yourself that your mistakes are what makes you exceptional and something that you can proudly identify with. Irrespective of your tenacious and admirable work on any given project or task, mistakes are bound to happen along the way.
It is important that appreciate the kindness of others around you who can tolerate the mistakes you make. Embrace your imperfect self by following the following simple exercise which is essential in breaking down the notion of excess perfectionism.
If you feel like a failure, sit down and come up with a list of 14 positive things you have accomplished in your day, ensuring you list down even the most trivial of details. For instance, you manage to go down the stairs without a tumble; you made a sweet pot of coffee, and so on.
The next tip is revisiting your daily events by taking a “mental photo” of the best and great things that happened. Revisiting such moments like accomplishing a given task, receiving words of praise from colleagues at work are important especially when you are relaxing and winding down.
The third tip is by enlisting a damage report of what went wrong in your day. You must embrace your mistakes, share them out to your family and friends, and make a good story out of your mishaps. Sharing your failures is a vital way of gaining affection and planning to do better next time.
Another critical tip is letting yourself have or go through a “blissful imperfect” day. Some of the great examples, in this case, include wearing something unsuitable to work, asking for help from friends or colleagues, or simply calling a wrong number and saying "sorry", witty right? By allowing yourself to intentionally have a completely imperfect day are essential in helping you relax your unconscious mind which might be wired on the idea that each new day is a step forward without any hurdles. Embracing and appreciating the sloppiness and daily challenges of your daily life is the ultimate way of coming to terms with the rhythm of the cycle of life.
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Soteldo Psychotherapy, Counselling & Consulting Services (SPCCS) M. Raquel S. Soteldo, CCC, ABA, MA, PMP Text: 613-400-0128