Soteldo Psychotherapy
A Person-Centered Approach to Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Codependency
by Raquel Soteldo RP
A Certified Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician
(343) 312-5283
Parenting
SNOMED Terms
Adjustment disorder with disturbance of conduct
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
Conduct disorder, adolescent-onset type
Family history of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
No diagnosis on Axis II
Residual adult attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
Goals
Achieve a level of competent, effective parenting.
Effectively manage challenging problem behavior of the child.
Reach a realistic view and approach to parenting, given the child's developmental level.
Terminate ineffective and/or abusive parenting and implement positive, effective techniques.
Strengthen the parental team by resolving marital conflicts.
Achieve a level of greater family connectedness.
Behavioral Definitions
Express feelings of inadequacy in setting effective limits with their child.
Report difficulty in managing the challenging problem behavior of their child.
Frequently struggle to control their emotional reactions to their child's misbehavior.
Exhibit increasing conflict between spouses over how to parent/discipline their child.
Demonstrate a pattern of lax supervision and inadequate limit setting.
Regularly overindulge their child's wishes and demands.
Display a pattern of harsh, rigid, and demeaning behavior toward their child.
Show a pattern of physically and emotionally abusive parenting.
Lack knowledge regarding reasonable expectations for a child's behavior at a given developmental level.
Have exhausted their ideas and resources in attempting to deal with their child's behavior.
Diagnoses
Adjustment Disorder With Disturbance of Conduct
Adjustment Disorder With Mixed Disturbances of Emotions and Conduct
Neglect of Child
Parent-Child Relational Problem
Partner Relational Problem
Physical Abuse of Child
Sexual Abuse of Child
Oppositional Defiant Disorder
Disruptive Behavior Disorder NOS
Conduct Disorder, Adolescent-Onset Type
Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, Combined Type
Antisocial Personality Disorder
Dependent Personality Disorder
Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Diagnosis Deferred
No Diagnosis on Axis II
What is Parenting?
Parenting refers to the process of raising or nurturing a child from infancy to adulthood. It involves providing for a child's physical, emotional, and social needs. Here's a breakdown of some key aspects of parenting:
Providing Basic Needs: This includes ensuring a child has safe shelter, nutritious food, clean water, and proper medical care.
Nurturing Emotional Well-being: Parents play a crucial role in shaping a child's emotional development. This involves offering love, affection, and support, while also setting boundaries and teaching them how to manage emotions.
Encouraging Social Development: Parents help their children learn how to interact with others, build relationships, and navigate social situations.
Guiding Moral Development: Parents instill values, teach right from wrong, and help children develop a moral compass.
Education and Learning: Parents play a significant role in a child's education, both by supporting formal schooling and by providing learning opportunities at home.
Preparing for Adulthood: Ultimately, the goal of parenting is to raise a child who can become a self-sufficient, responsible, and thriving adult.
Parenting Styles:
There are different parenting styles, and what works best can vary depending on the child's personality and the parent's values. Here are some common styles:
Authoritative: These parents set clear expectations but are also responsive to their child's needs and encourage open communication.
Authoritarian: These parents have strict rules and high expectations, with less emphasis on explanation or open communication.
Permissive: These parents set few rules and allow their children a lot of freedom.
Uninvolved: These parents provide little guidance or structure in their child's life.
Effects of Parenting
Here's a breakdown of the potential consequences on both parents and children:
Effects on Children:
Positive Effects:
Healthy Development: Good parenting practices contribute to a child's physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development.
Strong Sense of Security: Feeling loved, supported, and having their needs met by parents fosters a secure attachment style in children, leading to better emotional well-being and stronger relationships later in life.
Positive Self-Esteem: Parental encouragement, validation, and guidance can nurture a child's self-esteem and confidence.
Resilience: Supportive parenting helps children develop coping mechanisms to navigate challenges and setbacks throughout life.
Moral Development: Parents play a key role in shaping a child's moral compass by instilling values and teaching them right from wrong.
Negative Effects:
Unhealthy Development: Poor parenting practices, neglect, or abuse can hinder a child's development and lead to physical, emotional, and social problems.
Insecurity and Attachment Issues: Inconsistent or unavailable parenting can lead to insecure attachment styles, affecting a child's ability to form healthy relationships later in life.
Low Self-Esteem: Harsh criticism, neglect, or lack of encouragement from parents can negatively impact a child's self-esteem and confidence.
Poor Emotional Regulation: Children raised in chaotic or neglectful environments may struggle to manage their emotions effectively.
Behavioral Problems: Lack of discipline, clear boundaries, or positive reinforcement can lead to behavioral problems in children.
Effects on Parents:
Positive Effects:
Personal Growth: Parenting can lead to personal growth and development as parents learn new skills, gain patience, and develop stronger emotional intelligence.
Stronger Bonds: The process of raising children can strengthen bonds within a couple and create lasting memories.
Greater Sense of Purpose: Parenting can provide a sense of purpose and meaning in life, especially for those who value nurturing and helping others grow.
Joy and Fulfillment: Raising children can be a source of immense joy, love, and purpose in life.
Negative Effects:
Stress and Exhaustion: Parenting can be very demanding, leading to stress, exhaustion, and burnout.
Strained Relationships: The challenges of parenting can strain relationships between partners as they navigate sleep deprivation, differing parenting styles, and financial pressures.
Loss of Identity: Some parents, particularly mothers, may feel a loss of their own identity as they focus on their children's needs.
Financial Strain: The cost of raising a child can be a significant financial burden on parents.
Limited Personal Time: Parents often have less time for themselves and their hobbies due to the demands of childcare.
Parenting is a complex and ever-evolving experience. By understanding the potential effects on both children and parents, individuals can approach this journey with more awareness and be better prepared to navigate its challenges and embrace its many rewards.
How does Parenting affect your life?
Here's how parenting can affect individuals' lives based on general knowledge:
Personal Growth and Development: Parenting can be a transformative experience that fosters personal growth and development.
Time and Energy Commitment: Parenting requires a significant investment of time, energy, and resources.
Emotional Rollercoaster: Parenthood involves a wide range of emotions, from profound love and joy to frustration and exhaustion.
Impact on Relationships: The dynamics of romantic relationships may shift as couples navigate the demands of parenthood together.
Financial Considerations: Parents must budget for expenses such as childcare, education, healthcare, clothing, and extracurricular activities.
Identity and Self-Image: Becoming a parent may reshape one's priorities, values, and aspirations, leading to a reevaluation of personal goals and ambitions.
Long-Term Impact: Parenting has a long-term impact on individuals' lives, as well as on the lives of their children.
Overall, parenting is a multifaceted experience that can profoundly affect individuals' lives in various ways. While it brings immense rewards and fulfillment, it also comes with challenges and responsibilities that require dedication, patience, and love.